How the Average Guy Can Succeed on Dating Apps
Online dating can feel rigged against you. The algorithms, the competition, and the ghosting stack up fast. If you’re an average guy using dating apps, it can feel like everyone else has an advantage.
But here’s the truth: unless you're a Quasimodo-looking mofo (and odds are you’re not), there is a systematic way for the average guy to compete on dating apps and start getting real matches.
This post breaks down exactly how average men can improve their dating app results by fixing presentation, positioning, and profile strategy.
Understand the Market You're Competing In
Online dating is the most accessible playing field for modern dating. But that accessibility also means massive competition. Every guy with a phone and internet is in the same game, and only a few are winning. On dating apps, the average guy isn’t competing against supermodels. He’s competing against men who present themselves better.
Here’s how the online dating market works:
ELO Score / Algorithm Visibility
Each profile gets a hidden score based on how attractive it is to users. More inbound likes and successful matches push your score up, which gives your profile better visibility. For the average guy, dating apps reward momentum. The better your photos perform, the more exposure you get.
Superficiality Rules
Photos, bios, and small pieces of text are all women have to judge you by. You’re basically submitting a resume for someone to date you, and most guys are sending in sloppy, low-effort applications.
Most men post:
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Basic, poorly lit photos
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Boring or overly try-hard bios
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Irrelevant or filler content (like pet pics or car shots)
This leads to mass rejection in a short time span, and the algorithm buries your profile. But it’s not a personal flaw. For the average guy, it’s almost always a presentation problem.
Fix your presentation, and you change your results. Even one better photo can break the zero-match curse.
👉 Want to see how guys are fixing this? Check my portfolio of dating app photos for examples.
Your Dating App Profile Is a Digital Product
Treat your profile like a product page. It’s not you. It’s a virtual representation of you. And in a visual-first market, photos are your #1 asset.
What Makes a Photo High-Performing?
✨ Be Attractive (maximize your look):
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Confident facial expression
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Flattering pose and posture
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Clean, styled outfit
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Great lighting and composition
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Light touch-ups without catfishing
🌍 Seem Interesting (show range):
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Different locations and settings
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A mix of candid and posed shots
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Show personality through action (not just "stuff")
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Highlight real hobbies with you in the frame
Minimum Standard: At least 6 strong photos with variety in look, outfit, and background for Hinge.
You can take solid photos yourself with a tripod and timer, but hiring a photographer can elevate everything. And yes, your first photo must be your absolute best. Think 3/4 body shot with the cleanest look possible.
💡 I cover this more in my Portland dating app photographer guide but the same principles apply anywhere.
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Unoptimized photo: cluttered, distracting, low-impact
Optimized photo: clean, confident, intentional
Craft Prompts That Don’t Kill the Vibe
On dating apps, average guys rarely lose because they’re “too boring.” They lose because their prompts feel socially off. Prompts and bios rarely get you matches, but they absolutely can lose you matches.
Avoid:
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Cringe humor or sarcasm that doesn’t land
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Dry, resume-style personality descriptions
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Excessively transparent or vulgar content
Instead:
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Write like you’re a chill guy with a bit of flavor
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Show some social calibration (you understand how people talk and joke)
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Lean into your unique vibe without oversharing
For the average guy, avoiding mistakes matters more than being wildly creative.
Keep it fun, light, and open-ended. That’s enough to build curiosity.
Outcompete by Outpresenting
Most average guys lose on dating apps not because of who they are, but because of how they present themselves.
You can stand out just by doing the basics right:
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Upgrade your photos
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Write casual, engaging prompts
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Avoid the common pitfalls that tank most profiles
On dating apps, the average guy who fixes the fundamentals immediately moves ahead of 80% of the competition. You don’t need to be model-tier to succeed on dating apps as an average guy. You just need to be better than the average profile, and that bar is low.
The best part? Once your profile is strong, that’s 90% of the game right there. Now you have matches, conversations, and chances to connect. Everything after that is execution.
So can the average guy succeed on dating apps? Yes. But not accidentally.
When you understand how dating apps work and optimize your photos, prompts, and positioning, you stop being invisible and start becoming competitive. This is how average men turn dating apps into leverage instead of frustration.
You can see how I did that for an actual client here.
👉 If you want help building that standout profile, book a free strategy call with me here.
Stay based.